Setting: Oji Wonah Ogbudu Girls Academy (OWOGA), Yala
Enter, the Narrator and the Audience.
Narrator: Story, story.
Audience: Story.
Narrator: S-t-o-r-y!
Narrator: Story, story
Audience: Story!
Narrator: One day, two pretty girls, both students of Oji Wonah Ogbudu Girls Academy (OWOGA), Yala went out to play at the back of their college’s refectory.
They were playing a game of Tete in which each player was expected to raise one of her legs and quiz the other competitor. Dola having completed her turn, for it was a turn by turn game, it was therefore now Aisha’s turn to play.
Aisha, unlike Dola had played a fast one on Dola, refusing to vary her question and she kept asking the same question to the displeasure of Dola, who continued to get it wrong.
Although Dola complained, Aisha who seemed to have a streak of tyranny and domineering character embedded in her soul, simply told her to shut up! Aisha told Dola that she never complained when it was her turn, and why would Dola now complain?
Enter, Aisha: (Followed afterwards by Dola).
Enter, Dola: (Untying her wrapper, getting ready for the Game of Leg. She handed her first question which was written in her own writing to Aisha).
Aisha: (Aisha, losing her own wrapped paper containing her question). Tete! Tete! (Raising one of her legs up). What is the full meaning of PhD?
Dola: Doctor of Philosophy.
Aisha: W-r-o-n-g! W-r-o-n-g! W-r-o-n-g!
Dola: (Surprised and began to grimace, waiting for the next question).
Aisha: Tete! Tete! Tete! What is PhD?
Dola: (Protesting). But you have just asked me that very question!
Aisha: Ssssh – Shoooooooooo! I did not complain when you were asking yours.
Dola: (Cogitating). Pull him Down!
Aisha: (Seems to be relishing the fact that she has the upper hand in the Game of Leg). Again, wrong! Wrong, wrong! You are w-r-o-n-g!
Dola: (Now in a state of high anxiety, wondering what the acronym could mean). Em..em..I’m coming…please give me some time to think.
Aisha: (Very excited as she regaled in the toughness of her quiz). Ready? Ready for the next question, eh? Ready? Are you now ready for the next question?
Dola: (Affirmed, signifying she was ready). Yes! Y-e-s! Yeee-s!
Aisha: (Breathing in and out). Last question! Last question! Ready? Last question! Ready!
Dola: (Anxious). Yes! Yes!
Aisha: (In a very high mood). I say, what is PhD?
Dola: Pay him Dollars!
Aisha: (Exhilarated). Wrong! Wrong! Shall I tell you the meaning?
Dola: Tell!
Aisha: Should I?
Dola: Tell!
Aisha: Shall I?
Dola: Tell! Tell! Tell!
Aisha: (Increasing her tempo, whilst breathing in and out very fast). Ready! Ready! Ready!
Dola: (Waiting with unabated breath). Yes!
Aisha: Ready!
Dola: Yes!
Aisha: Ready!
Dola: Yes!
Aisha: (Triumphantly). PROFESIONAL HIJACKERS OF DEMOCRACY!
Looking towards the back of the dinning hall, he saw some people in khaki climbing the wall). Dola! Dola! Run!
Exeunt: The light fades and all the audience took to their heels.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Let my people give peace a chance. Elections are mere games of number played in love and out of love and in the spirit of love, friendship and universal altruism. Fellow Nigerians, give peace a chance or perish like fools.
Johnny Boy
ENGLAND, UNITED KINGDOM.
** *The Voice of One crying in the Diaspora…proudly leading the NATIONALISTS UNITY MOVEMENT OF NIGERIA (NUMON).
CHIEF LEADER WRITER, THE NIGERIAN ELECTIONS INTELLIGENCE SERVICES BUREAU, EUROPE & THE AMERICAS.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
John Odey Aduma was formerly Executive Secretary, Foundry Association of Nigeria; Southern Coordinator and the Public Affairs Manager of President Muhammadu Buhari's pastoralists NGO - THE PASTORAL RESOLVE; Chairman, Editorial Board of the Daily Times of Nigeria Plc; member, National Committee for the Nigerian Youth Festival, 1993; Core Committee, the Nigerian Conservation Foundation (NCF)/Ford Foundation, Kano Eastern Bypass Roadside Tree Planting Exercise, 1997; member, core Committee of the National Technology Summit and was the Summit's chairman for two of its sub-committees - Publicity and Exhibition, 1998; member of the Administrative Panel of Inquiry set up by President Olusegun Obasanjo to investigate the illegal trade in and smuggling of endangered species of wild fauna and flora into and out of Nigeria, 2003.
He was the Chairman, Planning Committee of the General Murtala Muhammed Memorial Lecture for two consecutive years, 2001 and 2002 before it attained a Foundation status in 2002, having first been upgraded to that status in 2001.
General Murtala Muhammed was one of Nigeria's former Heads of State and was killed in the abortive coup led by the then Colonel Buka Suka Dimka on February 13, 1976.
That same capacity saw Mr Aduma delivering huge successes during the Daily Times of Nigeria's 75th Anniversary (in which he raked in N6, 000, 000 into the coffers of the Daily Times of Nigeria Plc) and also, playing a similar role in a similar capacity during Dr Isma'il Babatunde Jose's 75th Birth Day. Dr Jose, doyen of Nigerian journalism was Mr Aduma's personal mentor. That relationship was so close and solid such that whilst Aduma was leaving the shores of Nigeria for Britain in 2003, Dr Jose gave him N10, 000.00.
In 1992, Mr Aduma's contributions to journalism was recognised with the awards of the Nigeria Media Merit Award as the Investigative Reporter of the Year and the Diamond Awards for Media Excellence as the Reporter of the Year, and the British Chevening Scholarship, which saw him studying International Journalism with Specialism in Environment at City, University of London in 2003-2004.
Aduma is the author of the inspirational best-seller, THE DIAMONDS ARE HERE and the founder of Vigilance, the World's Leading Security Magazine and Scorpion News Corp, in addition to founding the Nationalists Unity Movement of Nigeria (NUMON).
He is also, involved in professional mentoring at Post Graduate level in the City, University of London’s Post Graduate Professional Mentoring Strand.
